Throughout December, I always skip track number 6 on my Xmas CD. It’s special. Reserved for that magical moment when art becomes reality, and we are indeed “Driving home for Christmas”. We sing-along as we navigate the M40: it signals the start of our celebrations. But this year I forgot my CD. We’d packed halfheartedly, … More Christmas cake, Stockings and the Flu!
My lungs have a hate list. A long index of things that they dislike. It’s new. They used to be quite compatible and easy-going… but in the last few months they’ve started disliking things that they previously didn’t mind. They’re behaving like toddlers, the terrible twos. But instead of screaming over their sudden aversion to … More ‘Adjusting My Sails’ to live with Hyper-Sensitive Lungs
At the weekend I turned my central heating on for the first time. I debated whether to take that significant step for a few hours, before eventually my shivering body and blue fingers convinced me it was time. It was the day. It couldn’t be put off any longer. So I did. And although it … More Saying Goodbye To My Superpowers
Throughout these past few months, the latter half of summer, a little fear has niggled away at the back of my mind. For the majority of time it has remained hidden, forgotten; I rarely worry about the future. But it has popped up at every recent recovery day. Opening my eyes -feeling sick after a … More The Latter Half Of Summer
My house reeks of vinegar. Despite opening all of the windows, my clothes have a sharp aroma, my eyes gently sting and I fear I’m slowly pickling the dog. No, I’ve not developed an unhealthy obsession with chip shop eggs… it’s chutney making season again. In my life before Pulmonary Hypertension, there was no chutney … More The Head Gardener
We’ve driven past the outskirts of the New Forest countless times, but never before been tempted to turn off at the junction. From the A338, it looks like an expense of knee-high bracken, wild ferns and the odd spiky bush. A perfect wilderness for walkers, but completely inaccessible for my mobility scooter. Turns out there … More An Accessible National Park
I remember the first Christmas Phil spent with my family. Mere hours after our arrival, he disappeared. I found him lying on my childhood bed, in silence, eyes staring at the ceiling. He needed a break from us. From the noise and over-excitement and frenzied activity. I recall being puzzled… why couldn’t he cope in … More Sensory Overload
The first time I saw this photograph I was truly shocked. It was May 2016 and I’d just returned from a wonderful day trip with an old friend. But instead of looking at this picture and seeing our happy smiles, I just cried inside. All I could see was me looking odd. Not like me. … More The Photo That Made Me Cry
I’ve been waiting for a year now. Thirteen months in fact. Thirteen -unbelievably quick, speeding by- months. Its been over a year since I took that terrifying call to hear if I’d been accepted on to the transplant list. It’s been over a year since I signed the forms agreeing to accept new lungs if … More One Year On The Transplant List
It is the day after yesterday. The day after the fun. The day after the meeting and hugging, the laughing and teasing, the catching up and reminiscing. The day after the singing and talking until the lungs couldn’t cope. The day after the walking and moving until the body got weak. The day after the … More The Day After Yesterday
We Can Adjust The Sails 